There, There... All Better!

As the above video points out, not all proofreading efforts lead to success.  As a college professor, I have to laugh at some of my students' bloopers... sometimes I mercifully correct them... sometimes I shrug it off as a lost cause.

One Christmas, when my sister's girls were much younger, they excitedly came to our house to see the Christmas tree I had put up in the basement.  I really enjoy Hallmark ornaments, and they loved seeing some of the different decorations.  My younger niece burst into the room first, yelling "I seed it!  I seed it!" at the top of her lungs.  Her older sister, always in the spirit of watching out for her, corrected her grammar, "No, Trisha, it's 'I SAWED it.'"

During one vacation my wife and I shared at a brand spankin' new resort on the north shore of Lake Superior, I happened to look down while showering and noticed water seeping up under the fresh pine baseboards.  Later that morning, I went to the front desk to inform the clerk that they may want to avoid water damage by caulking the baseboards.  She thanked me as I watched her write the note to her maintenance staff, "Shower in 103 needs cock."  Um, yeah... let's just not go there.  (Although I've always been curious what went through the mind of the maintenance staffer who was on the receiving end of that note.)

In our world of six-sigma-lean-TQM-continuous-improvement, are we REALLY making things better?  I've seen more than once where the cost-cutting efficiency efforts actually hurt the organization.  It seems that often, efficiency runs counter to effectiveness.

We may have saved a few bucks, but did we really make the overall process and the final end result BETTER?  Are our customers any happier?  Are the people doing the jobs any more satisfied?  Have we sped things up?  Are decisions more streamlined or better informed?

Or have we "proofread" one thing just to mess up something else?

Where have YOU seen one thing fixed, which in turn broke five other things?

Birthday Drawing Results

With the help of the lovely and talented Vanna (OK, so my wife subbed), we had the drawing this weekend for all of the really cool gifts in my birthday give-away.  Congratulations to all who entered... obviously, your accomplishments ARE the big prize:

Retail Superstars - Elizabeth

Greater Than Yourself - Melissa Labus (signed by Steve Farber himself)

I Hate People - Jana Brem and "Ms. Admin"

Remarkable Leadership - Carlos Urreta

99.3 Random Acts of Marketing - Pete Jones

Accomplishment 3-Pack (Race Through the Forest, GUST, and SWAT) - Linda Zdanowicz (signed by yours truly)

Congratulations, one and all!  Thanks for playing!

Does This Bureaucracy Make Me Look Fat?

I can't do it without authorization.

I'm sorry.  We have to wait for approval.

You'll need five signatures to get that moving forward.

My boss won't let me.

AAARRRG.  It's called a DECISION!

How do you sacrifice a virgin?

Trouble getting things moving in your organization?  The Wall Street Journal published an interesting article by Julian Birkinshaw and Suzanne Heywood yesterday correlating size with accomplishment (or lack thereof).

We've all understood intuitively for years that with organizational size comes greater complexity.  (DUH!)  The value of this article is how the authors break this down even further by explaining the different types of complexity within an organization:

• Dysfunctional - as the name implies, this is the "bad" complexity that adds no value and just makes you work harder for nothing. According to the authors, this kind of complexity is built in over years. My own take is that we tend to generalize all complexity as being dysfunctional and label it with the blanket of bureaucracy. But... not necessarily so...
• Designed - this is planned complexity created on purpose, similar to what Dell did when they created mass-customization. The authors go on to say that some designed complexity can actually lessen dysfunctionality. I personally used this philosophy when designing project change control procedures in a highly dysfunctional big box employer in town. While it added complexity, the added hoops reduced dysfunctionality.
• Inherent - this is just the complexity that's left when you strip away dysfunctional and designed complexity... simply put, how hard is it to naturally do the job? The authors used flight controllers as an example. I'd add into that any job that is highly specialized... programmers, accountants, Olympian figure skaters.
• Imposed - complexity which is outside the control of the company is the last category. I've mentioned before working on government regulatory projects such as HIPAA before. It's highly complex and was imposed by the outside. As a blogger, I sometimes find Typepad itself possesses some very annoying complexity. And don't even get me started about Technorati... have quit using it altogether.

The bottom line again circles back to systems thinking, folks.  Identify the inputs causing the complexity, and it becomes pretty easy to categorize whether it's a value-added complexity or just bureaucratic fodder.

When you find yourself faced with a complex process or job, ask yourself the following:

1. What's causing the complexity?
2. What factors do I control in the complexity?
3. How much can I experiment with this job/process to make it less complex?
4. How far can I push the envelope before anybody notices?
5. Would anybody (including me) go to jail or get fired by simplifying the complexity?
6. When did this complexity come into play? (a tell-tale sign of dysfunctional complexity)

Ultimately, it all comes down to the authors' recommendations to either reduce, channel, or accept the complexity in your system.

Why is this important?  Well, rather than just labeling something as too complex (thereby dismissing your own accountability for fixing it), this article (and this mindset) allows you to dissect the problem a little more succinctly.

And in the end, isn't that the most important aspect of accomplishment?

Blind, Deaf, and Dome

I'm not a sports buff.  There, I've said it.  I can appreciate and coexist with sports.  I understand the basics of most sports (except curling; I still see no point in that as an Olympic sport).  I can root for teams, and I do have favorites.

So it was a bit of a surprise when I noticed a piece in this morning's Wall Street Journal asking if it was time the NFL banned domes.  The authors' claim is that indoor teams develop a dominatingly fast and precise offense because of their "weatherless" environment.  First of all, I think the authors of the piece should be sent to a statistics class (the most basic one, please).  All of their data is based on either current year selected teams or prior year outliers.  Even they acknowledge in the article that the Rams and the Lions (both indoor teams) combined have a 1-11 record this year.  They mentioned the 1999 Rams, writing up Kurt Warner's spectacular run as a quarterback to his INDOOR experience at arena football.  Maybe they were too busy writing sports briefs to actually catch a game, but the reason Kurt Warner was good was because of the fast pace of arena football.  It could have been played at Lambeau Field in January, and it still would have been fast paced.

I'm surprised they didn't recommend banning all outdoor fields south of the Mason-Dixon line while they were at it.  After all, if a team can't play in the blinding snow and/or driving rain, what's the point?  Personally, I've always assumed the opposite premise was intuitively true, since those who play outdoors in northern climates would naturally be tougher and better able to adapt to any environment.

So why am I going on a tirade about football venues?  Well, we do the same thing in business, don't we?  Very few companies get to choose their business environment.  Every system, every organization operates in an environment.  It's a key component of systems thinking.  Right now, the general economic environment stinks, but nobody chose this environment (except for the greedy brokers of Wall Street, the shoddy mortgage underwriting policies of the past 15 years, the fine upstanding credible staff at Moody's, and an accountant named O'Leary whose cow knocked over a lantern and started the whole mess).

The trick in systems thinking is to figure out how to modify your system to make the best of your business environment.  So our customer base is drying up.  Do we make less?  Modify our pricing structure?  Purchase a new company?  Undermine a competitor?  Find new products and/or new customers?  The bottom line is still the bottom line, regardless of the environment in which it operates.  Sometimes you can get lucky and modify the environment.  Other times you have to tough it out.  Like the Patriots, whose last 10 seasons (2009 included) are 106-44 or the love-em-or-hate-em Packers who have a respectable 84-60 from 2000 to 2008 (adjusting for any flaws in my math if I miscalculated the totals in my brain).

What about you?  What's in your environment that you want to blame for your business results?  How can you adjust your inputs or transformation processes to adapt in order to get the outputs and feedback loops you desire?

But what do I know?  I'm not a sports buff.

Where the Filed Things Are

Some day, I'm going to write a book.

Some day, I'll run a marathon.

Some day, I'll clean that closet.

Some day, I'm going to take that vacation I've always wanted.

Accomplishments come in all shapes and sizes.  The only accomplishment that doesn't fit is the one that never gets accomplished.  We make excuses.  We procrastinate.  We "re-prioritize."  We daydream.  But we don't DO.

But that's not always a bad thing.  Accomplishments take time.  I ran across a long-term goals page I had written out about 15 years ago.  Included in my long term goals were:

• Become a college instructor
• Write a book
• Become an independent consultant
• Speak to audiences nationwide

Only one of those goals started and was realized almost immediately (college instructor).  The other three have only come to real fruition in the last four or five years.

Sometimes, we have to tell our dreams "not yet."  The real trick is to keep track of them during that waiting period.  Famed choreographer, dancer, and author Twyla Tharp suggests keeping a box to file away everything contributing to the creation of your accomplishments.  In her words, "Before you can think outside the box, you have to have a box."  She shared how she built her box for the stage performance of Movin' Out, which she collaborated with Billy Joel.

I keep track of my planned accomplishments on paper and electronically.  I'll jot down a line which would make a great sentence or paragraph in another book and store it in an electronic file.  I'll track people's names who'd make great character names.  I keep ideas for that restaurant I may want to open some day.  There's a completed children's book sitting on my laptop.  There are bins and boxes of wild things everywhere which feed my imagination and my accomplishments.

In the quest to Carpe Factum, remember it's OK to store your planned accomplishments away for a while.  Just remember where you put them, and don't forget to pull them out and dust them off every once in a while... just to keep the dream alive... and the wild rumpus going.

So.... what are your "filed things" and where are you keeping them?

Dwarfing Leadership

Once upon a time, Dopey and Grumpy were promoted to managers.  Dopey was in over his head, and Grumpy yelled at everyone.  And nobody lived happily ever after.  The end.

Not much of a plot, eh?

How about if we make it more interesting... say... we genetically fuse Dopey and Grumpy.  That's what the folks at University of California Berkeley have done in their recently released study.  They've discovered that bosses who perceive themselves as inadequate or incompetent are far more likely to bully (and even sabotage) their subordinates.

Kind of explains the Bush-Cheney administration, doesn't it?  (Yeah, yeah, I know... one of the ironies of being a Republican who can view things objectively.)

According to the study, over a third of American workers have been bullied.  I've seen some of the ugliest bullies on the planet in my career, and my work with Office-Politics.com exposes me to worse ones than my imagination could conjure up.

So what do we do about all of this?  Do we suck up to our bosses to make them feel better about themselves?  Well, there is something to helping another individual maintain a modicum of self-esteem.  But what if the boss is just your basic WUHOT?  You can try to help him or her look good... to a point.  You can watch the floundering and even try to expedite the inevitable, but that only makes people miserable in the interim.  You definitely should document every exchange you have with this boss.

Have you ever had an incompetent boss?  What did you do to manage upward?

I Know What I Want For My Birthday

Yeah, yeah, my birthday was yesterday.  But now it's time for the gifts... not mine, yours.

I have a whole lot of stuff to give away.  And my readers are my favorite targets for gift giving.  So here's the scoop:  comment on this post with your most significant accomplishment (personal or professional).  Each comment will be an entry for a drawing for some great stuff:

• Signed copy of Steve Farber's latest book, Greater Than Yourself
• Copies of the Marc Hershon and Jonathan Littman book, I Hate People
• Trifecta of Accomplishment:  One copy of all three of my books (that's right, including my new one)
• Lots of other goodies to be announced throughout the month

The drawing will be on Halloween at noon (CDT)

So tell me... what are your big accomplishments (either already accomplished or planned on the horizon)?  Share with me, and I'll share with you!

But What Does It LOOK Like?

“I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.” -E.B White.

When the Register published their interview with me a few weeks ago, I included this as one of my favorite quotes.

Since then, a few of my friends have challenged me:  OK, how do you change the world?  Exactly what does it look like?

It does sound rather lofty, doesn't it?  I've always been one who wanted to make a difference.  When I first read Steve Farber's work, it brought it into a little more focus.  Changing the world is not a grandiose scheme (at least it doesn't have to be).

Case in point:  Last month when my mom was in the hospital, I was walking across the skywalk with a new dad who was about to take his daughter home.  I was sharing how much fun it was to have daughters, and he confessed he had been hoping for a son and wasn't quite sure about raising a girl.  My response:  "Are you kidding??  From here on out, you will be known as Prince Daddy.  If you play your cards right, there will always be one female on the planet who thinks you are the coolest, smartest, neatest, funnest, and bestest man out there.  You will be the benchmark by which she judges every other male.  You will melt when she kisses your cheek.  You will learn the backstory and bio of every Disney Princess.  Your heart has been physically removed from your chest and now is her permanent squeaky toy.  You will NEVER know a world without unconditional love."  His entire demeanor changed, as he admitted that nobody else was telling him that.  Now, maybe I changed the world (at least for that one little girl) by telling him that.  Maybe I didn't.  But I tried.  I hope her world will be different and he'll be an amazing father.

Today I visited my uncle probably for the last time.  I talked with his wife and his kids and his grandkids.  I've known him as part of my life for almost 43 years.  Will he be written up in history books?  Nope.  Will there ever be a Ken Burns documentary on him?  Most likely not.  Did he change the world?  You bet he did!  He left a legacy of love, hard work, commitment, loyalty, and fairness that those around him will carry forward.  The world around him changed because of his actions and character.  And he affected other worlds.  And those worlds affected still others.

Changing the world, surprisingly, looks a lot like living your life... day to day... with purpose... with focus... and with love.  And there are days when looking at yourself in the mirror at the end of it all... and smiling... is really the best accomplishment.

SWAT Under Cover

All this talk about a new book.  Well, SWAT - Seize the Accomplishment is now at the printer.  The cover has been designed.  And we now have a release date:

01.10.10

More details to follow, but it's exciting that the book project is almost complete.

Who knew accomplishment and systems thinking could be this much fun?

Showing Up in a Huff(-ington)

Very cool.  My new blog buddy, Marc Hershon (co-author of I Hate People) just did an amazing piece on standing out in the work place (in a good way).  And he was nice enough to quote li'l ol' me.  Now it's being featured in the Huffington Post.

Thanks, Marc, for the nod.  For someone who's an expert at hating people, you sure are darn likeable.  Great work on compiling some useful advice for every office dweller.